Do you expect good things to happen to you? Or do you wander around in a dreamworld of negativity, where your expectations about what's going to happen to you, about what the world is going to produce for you, are basically negative?
When you put yourself into a situation where you hope to get a certain outcome, do you guard against disappointment by expecting something negative to happen?
The thing is, what you expect from life depends on your past experiences, mostly on what you learned to expect from the world around you during childhood.
For negative experiences can teach any child not to hope or expect good things.
Whatever your expectation level is this awesome guide will teach you how to have positive expectations, and think positive thoughts always and at the same time have the belief that good things take time.
#1. Disappointment is a killer as far as optimism is concerned.
So a negative attitude is all about how often we were disappointed as children, and what we come to believe about the world as a result.
Because, of course, your attitude to life as an adult depends on what you learned when you were a child.
If you learned that life was going to be a disappointment and you couldn’t expect good things to happen – then that's what you will most likely believe and expect in adulthood.
Now, think for a moment about the difference between belief and expectation (or expectancy) – this is important.
A simple way of making this clear is to say: I BELIEVE that a man or a woman can go to the moon. But I personally don't EXPECT to do so.
And while that's partly because I don't want to go to the moon, it's also partly because I don't have that level of positive expectation.
#2. An Example on Positive Expectation And Pessimism.
As one client said to me: “I believe that anyone can get into a wonderful romantic relationship.
But for much of my life, I didn't expect this would happen to me, because basically I didn't believe I had enough positive qualities to attract a great relationship partner.”
The difference between belief and expectancy is subtle, but it’s an important one, so let's look at some dictionary definitions.
Belief is a noun, and it has two meanings:
1. An acceptance that a statement is true or that something exists. For example: "His belief in the value of hard work."
2. Trust, faith, or confidence in someone or something. For example: “A belief in democratic politics."
Synonyms: faith, trust, reliance, confidence, credence
Whereas expectancy, which is also a noun, means something slightly different:
The state of thinking or hoping that something, especially something pleasant, will happen or be the case.
For example: "They waited with an air of expectancy." Synonyms: anticipation, expectation, eagerness, excitement.
#3. The Triumph Of Belief Over Expectancy.
When I was on holiday last year in Goa (India), I found lots of massage therapists on the beaches, offering back and foot massages to the people taking their vacations, as they were lying on the sun loungers.
And sure enough, every so often, a man or woman on a lounger sunbed would summon them over, and pay for a foot massage or a back massage.
But, as I watched, it became clear most of the massage therapists did not expect to succeed.
They had a despondent air about them, no doubt coming from all the times they were rejected, more or less politely.
As a result, they expected to be rejected. But at same time, they believed that every so often someone would buy their services.
And the fact is, every so often someone did. As I watched them, I wondered what would happen if they increased their level of expectancy or positive expectation (these two words mean the same thing)?
By projecting an attitude of negativity, giving off an expectation that most people would reject them, they were creating more rejection.
People who might have been on the verge of deciding to have a massage would probably be discouraged by the fact that most of the massage therapists turned away so easily and quickly - at the first hint of rejection, in fact!
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#4. A story about a boy.
On my vacation in Goa when I was sitting on the beach and meditating while watching the sunset.
Out of nowhere a little boy around the age of 6 came up to me and asked me if I wanted to buy one of the Lei’s(flower necklaces) he had around his neck.
I smiled, turned around to get the money. As soon as I turned around to give him the money, I saw that he was already several feet away and that he was walking away with his head down.
He had interpreted my action of turning around to get the money as a way of rejecting him and he had immediately decided to give up and walk away! I had to verbally call him back and give him the money.
The boy looked at me in disbelief and I wished I could speak the same language as him so I could explain to him the potential belief shift he could make at that given moment.
He turned around and walked away with a smile on his face, but it remains a mystery whether or not he learned the real lesson.
#5. The Universe Responds To Positive Expectations Combined With Desire.
Truth is, the universe doesn’t reward or manifest desire alone, it rewards desire combined with an absolute positive expectation of an outcome.
In simple words, think positive thoughts, expect good things to happen and also realize that good things take time.
The boy had the desire to sell me something and make money, but as soon as he met what he perceived as adversity, he gave up and started walking away.
The only difference is that the universe won’t call you back to give you your reward if you don’t have faith and just give up whenever you face challenges.
It was shocking to me that this boy was only 5-6 years old and had already been programmed to react to adversity by giving up.
If someone could be socially programmed to that effect in just 5 years, it is rather understandable how so many adults walk around with lots of wishes and desires, but no real expectation and faith in that they can actually fulfill their dreams.
#6. The Importance Of Positive Expectation And Desire.
Let's work on the assumption that every thought you have, every attitude and belief you hold in your subconscious, and every action you take, require energy and high level vibration to support them.
They also discharge energy into the universe when you think, express or act on them.
It's a very simple idea but fundamental to manifestation.
If your belief is that you potentially could – let's say – earn $1 million this year, but your thoughts constantly turn to doubts and challenges and problems so that you have no real expectation of ever achieving that goal, then you are simply putting energy into that negative expectation, and it will kill the chance of you manifesting the million dollars stone dead.
In other words, negative expectations stop positive manifestation. It's also possible that negative expectations create negative outcomes.
Certainly we know that manifesting anything requires a lot of energy in the form of intention, desire, or positive emotion. And that energy has to be sustained over a period of time to ensure that manifestation happens.
One of the problems that people face when they're trying to manifest anything is that their minds are distracted easily by what's happening to them in everyday life.
Only by conscious effort can you maintain your focus on the goal that you wish to achieve manifest in life.
Now, having said that, negative thoughts and doubts are probably less of a problem than most people think, because they tend to be transient and short lived.
But when somebody is constantly thinking about the negative things that could happen, when they have negative expectations about every aspect of their lives, and when these negative expectations occupy their minds for much of the time, then yes, you could certainly expect negative manifestation.
So if you want your goals to manifest successfully, when you set your goal you must have faith, a firm positive expectation that you will reach your goal at some point in your life, and you must keep that expectation positive.
When people talk about "getting out of your own way" what they mean is first abandoning the negative beliefs which stop you striving for what you can achieve AND also abandoning the negative expectations which stop you getting it.
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#7. Getting Out Of Your Own Way And Realizing That Good Things Take Time.
One of the important things here is to change your expectations so they are more positive, so they can encompass the possibility you will indeed get what you wish to manifest.
Just consider for a moment how your expectations guide you through life.
When you get up in the morning, do you expect to have a positive day, full of success and achievement, with positive events, positive conversations with other people, positive relationships with your spouse and family and children?
Do you expect your work to go well, to go positively, and to feed your confidence and belief in human nature?
And do you expect whatever happens to reinforce your belief in yourself?
Or do you, perhaps like most people, have some negative expectations?
For example, did you find yourself saying even as I asked you the questions above, something like this: “But with my job how could I possibly expect things to go well?”
To be honest, I think most of us probably have negative expectations of life.
The question is, what can we do about it? Glad you asked! The first and simplest thing you can do is to change your behavior so that it matches your expectations.
For example, if you really expected to have a new car, for example, you might want to make room for it in your garage.
Such a simple action is a demonstration of faith. Of expectancy. Of hope. Of entering into the possibility that your desires will be fulfilled.
Suppose you want a new relationship? Or you want to go out on a date with an exciting new partner? You could start by planning what you would wear on your first date and where you would go. You could go window shopping or explore the possibilities for evenings out in your area.
If you want a new house, you could start looking at property for sale, looking online, or exploring areas where you might want to live.
It’s important, of course, that you don’t do anything that’s going to make the situation worse – for example it may be self defeating to set a goal of $1 million income in the next year and then to start spending money as though you already had it!
All you need to do is take small actions which shift your expectations from negative to positive, or even more fundamentally, simply give you a new perspective on life and open up new possibilities.
But at the end of the day, whether or not you expect something to happen depends on what you believe to be true about yourself and your position in the world.
So, as always, it’s important to start by changing what you believe about yourself and your relationship to the world.
In this context, I refer you back to my article on belief where I made several suggestions about how you could change the beliefs which hold you back from achieving your full potential.
You may well find that once you’ve changed the beliefs you hold about yourself, your expectations of what life has to offer you – and of what you can manifest – become more aligned with your true potential and possibility.
And that possibility and potential isn’t going to be the same as anyone else’s.
The beliefs you hold about yourself are so fundamental and deep within yo that you can work on them your entire life and still not eliminate all the negative beliefs you have.
Fortunately, however, that’s not the purpose of working on negative beliefs.
The purpose of working on negative beliefs is really to allow you to achieve what you want to achieve in life.
Not all of us want to be a successful businessman like Richard Branson, or President of the United States like Barack Obama, or a respected world Elder like Nelson Mandela. Or a human savior like Mother Theresa. Or a world politician like Hillary Clinton.
All of us have different objectives and desires and wishes, and your fundamental purpose in life will reflect your innate capabilities, talents and potential.
And that’s where you need to focus your efforts, not on trying to achieve something that doesn’t suit who you are at the deepest level of your values and beliefs.
Which is why only you can set your goals and objectives, and why only you can work on the beliefs which stop you manifesting your true potential.
#8. Negative Expectations and Manifestation.
It’s really important you understand how negative expectations can impact manifestation.
Some people find they have the ability to visualize their goals and desired outcomes very easily, and they can focus on them and believe they will come to them while they’re in a relaxed state of mind.
But as soon as they go back into the world, they find themselves flooded with doubts – with negative expectations, in fact not remembering that good things take time.
One way to deal with this is to start by setting objectives which can give you more confidence in what you’re trying to achieve.
If you’re looking to manifest money, why not start with small amounts such as $10 or $100 ?
For, if your expectations are negative rather than positive, then you can reinforce them by having small successes and building on those.
Each time you achieve something bigger and better, your expectancy grows, which reinforces your belief that you’ll be able to manifest something even greater next time.
After all, what you expect to achieve in life is only the product of your past experience; when your past experiences are positive and growing bit by bit, your confidence and faith will grow too – and then you will find that manifesting what you want becomes second nature.
It’s a simple and obvious process, and as we shall see in the practical instructions on manifestation, you don’t actually need to spend a lot of time every day visualizing your objective.
It’s much more important that you have intense desire, complete belief, and positive expectations. That way you’re really going to be successful
