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Some people think that if they have been married for more than 10 years, their marriage is too strong to be ended. The question is if this true why couples divorce after decades of a happy marriage?
To be honest, that’s not exactly true!
Of course, the first years of married life are considered the hardest time in the couple’s life, but love and passion can help people overcome all challenges at this point.
According to the study, about 20 percent of marriages break up within the first five years and almost 32 percent of couples decide to end their relationships within the first ten years.
Here's why couples divorce - The statistics below on the percentage of divorce after decades of happy marriage says it all.
The United States ranks the 6th country in the world in regard to the divorce rate (there is one divorce every 13 seconds).
Moreover, researchers have obtained the shocking data of divorces after decades of a happy marriage in recent years.
Such data can be very surprising to you.
But in the US, more than 28 percent of couples divorce after a long-term marriage for various reasons.
One in four divorces happens among people age 50 and over and, moreover, wives are the ones who initiate separation at 66 percent on average.
This statistic shows that long-term couples break up almost more frequently than young couples in their first decade of marriage.
The figures above are impressive and unexpected for most of us.
However, why do people separate after so much time together?
What are the main reasons that make couples split up after decades of marriage?
A divorce at midlife is also known as gray divorce and getting divorced on the cusp of the golden years is not only common these days, but it is on the rise.
Here are the most common reasons to quit after staying together for so many years.
#3. Lack of Communication Leads to Divorce.
Actually, communication between spouses is one of the most crucial factors of their satisfying marriage.
But over the years, people often forget this.
As a result, poor communication, including shouting at a spouse, not contacting enough throughout the day, leaving unpleasant comments to express yourself, can lead to the divorce even after 10, 20 or 30 years of happy married life.
Being one of the most trivial reasons for divorce, cheating can ruin any long-term relationships.
For some couples, the marriage will end because of one love affair, but for others, it can be numerous affairs.
Although every affair destroys trust, weakens the relationship and leads to the breakdown in family structure.
#5. Financial Claims
When spending habits of spouses are different, this often results in misunderstanding and scandals.
If one spouse is a great spender who loves shopping and a good lifestyle, but the other likes to save money, financial issues are inevitable, especially when the claims have been accumulating for years.
In addition, money difficulties relating to expenditure on the children’s activities, expenses and college funds can cause divorce after being together for decades.
#6. Adult Children
It happens that some couples are held together by their children.
When the kids grow up, leave the home and start living independently, there is no reason to stay in the marriage for such families.
The home can be compared to the empty nest.
So when spouses realize how much of their time and effort they used to spend on their children, they don’t know how to live together and function as a pair anymore.
A big age difference isn’t a problem at the beginning of a relationship, but it may become a great issue over time.
When people reach their middle age, they may crave for a reboot.
This process involves physiological and biological brain updating.
Of course, this can also lead to transformation in values and ends any long-term marriage.
#8. Behavioral Changes and Addictions
All people change when getting older. They can also change their habits and hobbies.
Besides, various personal and behavioral changes like alcoholism, drug abuse or some psychiatric issues can be caused by illnesses, work problems, stresses, traumatic events, etc.
In this case, the spouse often either lends a helping hand to the partner or pursue their divorce.
As has been said, women are more likely to initiate divorce. The main reasons why women often leave their husbands are as follows:
1. Self-Actualization: The opportunity for self-actualization is very important for all women, especially when their kids grew up and became independent.
After decades of marriage, some wives realize that their partners don’t give them any opportunity to open their full potential and break up such relationships.
2. Sexual Dissatisfaction: Sexual intimacy matters a lot in marriage. Sex is a foundation for a strong marriage.
Sexually frustrating marriage for wives is commonly exhausted and emotionally empty.
When a woman is unsatisfied sexually, this usually means greater problems outside the bedroom.
3. Frustrated Expectations: Women commonly tend to overestimate their partners.
They also like to console themselves with the thought that they can change their husbands and all they really need is time.
Fast forward 10, 20 or even 30 years, but there are no changes… there are just frustrated hopes and expectations.
When it comes to divorce, sometimes men can also insist on splitting up after being together for a long time.
Below you’ll find 3 common reasons why this happens.
1. Boredom: Some wives fall into a rut, often forgetting that men hate the routine of life.
And when men feel that they’re boring, they start looking for new emotions on the side and thinking about divorce.
It’s no secret that daily routine can kill any relationships and long-term ones are no exception.
2. Lack of Appreciation: Men want to feel needed by their wives.
If a husband doesn’t feel appreciated and disillusioned by his spouse, such marriage is at risk of divorce.
3. No Common Interests: People change with age. And it can happen that the partners who have been married for more than 10 years suddenly understand that they have no common interests today.
This may be a crucial reason for divorce for most husbands because when they find they can’t share their interests with their wives anymore, they see no real meaning to such relationships.
As you see, even a long-term marriage can die, due to a number of rather common reasons.
The rise in gray divorce rates shows us that, unfortunately, no marriage is exempt from separation.
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My name is Manish Yadav and I’m the owner of the blog "Love Finds its Way". My advice does away with the manipulations and mind games recommended by magazines and the surface level advice of TV gurus… We’ll dive DEEP into the psychology and biology of desire and give you actionable steps you can use today. Over 900,000 men & women have transformed their relationships as a result, and I've been featured in Lifehack, Return of Kings, Menimprovement, Urban Dater, and so on......and no... We're not here to play games so you can manipulate your significant other......My only intention is to help you and your partner have a healthy and loving relationship by working on your intimacy with each other.And we’re just getting started!
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