Today you are going to learn all about the Cuffing Season and what you have to do to get a successful first date.
When the days are getting shorter and temperatures are rapidly dropping, it can be tough to put yourself out there and date.
But for many people, it’s just the opposite.
You may have seen a few memes joking about “cuffing season” — the time of year when every couples up and disappear.
According to the rules of “cuffing season”, when it’s cold outside, you should be spending all your time at home Netflix-and-chilling with bae.
If you’re getting back into the dating scene, check out these tips on being fully prepped for cuffing season.
Rules of engagement with social media for the Cuffing Season
Before they go on a first date, a majority of people —75% of women and 59% of men — check out their romantic prospect’s social media.
This is perfectly understandable.
We spend so much of our lives on social media platforms, it makes sense that someone would look at your profile to get a better sense of who you are.
But there’s a fine line between doing some light background research and being straight up creepy.
Beforehand, you could look at your date’s social media to look for any red flags or what they are generally interested in, but you shouldn’t feel like you already know the person.
Feel free to use it to subtly introduce topics that you think they may be interested in.
For example, if there’s an awkward lull of silence and you saw that they are into hiking from their Instagram, you can bring up the outdoors to break the ice.
If you noticed that you both have dogs then bring up your dog and show them a cute picture.
At the end of the day, however, social media is just one facet of a person so don’t be too dependent on it.
Ask the right questions
During your first date, you should ask questions that aren’t too personal but also can give you a better understanding of who they are.
Though you shouldn’t read off a sterile list like it’s a job interview, you can weave questions throughout your conversation.
Here are some things you can ask to get to know your date better:
- What are your favorite hobbies?
- What drew you to your career?
- How long have you been living here?
- If you had to travel where would you go?
- What are your passions?
- What are your favorite foods?
- Do you have a favorite movie?
- Do you have a favorite TV show?
There’s nothing wrong with being curious! But you should still be cautious about bringing up triggering topics. The last thing you want is a first date that ends with tears.
These are a few topics to avoid:
- Traumatic events.
- Past relationships or recent flings.
- Politics (unless you met at a political event and their stance on things is already known).
- Petty gossip or drama regarding your friends.
- Any other people you might be seeing.
- Negative comments about their appearance.
- Money, how much your salary is, etc.
- Sex or sexual history.
- Gross humor.
You should always set clear boundaries, even when you feel very comfortable with a person. Don’t get ahead of yourself — a good thing can easily go off the rails.
Aim to be your best self
It’s understandable to be nervous during a date.
Especially if you have been text-messagng with this person for a while, there is a lot of pressure for the date to live up to the hype. However, there is only so much you can control.
What you can control is how you present yourself.
Before your date, be sure to brush and style your hair as well as prep your skin if needed. Consider using an acne treatment to prevent any breakouts if you’re prone to them.
Dress to impress, but also remember to wear what you feel comfortable in.
Tip: Just remember not to overdress: this is a first date, not your wedding.
Chivalry is not dead!
Chivalry is far from dead. You need to be on your manners A-Game: open their door, walk them to their Uber or Lyft, and say “bless you” when they sneeze.
A few years ago, WhatsYourPrice polled 45,349 men and 63,460 women about their “first date pet peeves.”
It turns out that using your cellphone is a big no-no for a large swath of the dating population — 30 percent of women and 25 percent of women ranked it as the most annoying thing a date can do.
Unless there is a serious emergency, do not go on your phone during your date because it can make your date feel like you are not interested, bored, or even worse, flirting with another romantic prospect in front of them.
We live in a time where our phones are not just for calling and texting.
Our smartphones are packed with a myriad of apps that can interrupt your date with noisy notifications.
The moment your date starts, put your phone on silent or airplane mode so you can relax and focus on getting to know the person in front of you.
The WhatsYourPrice survey also found that people dislike it when their dates are rude to servers at a restaurant, get a bit too touchy, drink a lot of alcohol, and seem generally disengaged.
So, be yourself but also be mindful of how you are coming across!
Get a good night’s rest
Scientific research shows that sleep has a substantial impact on your mood.
We all have been there: you can’t get a good night’s rest, so for the next day you’re a cranky zombie.
You don’t want to show your date half-asleep and feeling super out of it.
The night before your date, you should try your best to sleep so you can be your best self and not be too anxious.
Here are a few ways you can improve your sleep:
- Cut out iPhones, laptops, and table devices before bed.
- Avoid alcohol or coffee.
- Do something relaxing or soothing.
- Get regular exercise.
- Avoid foods that you will have trouble digesting.
- Eat a Sleep Gummy Vitamin.
- Write in a journal about your anxious feelings.
Do something spontaneous in your Cuffing Season Date
Though you should always be mindful of what your date’s preferences, don’t succumb to normalcy just because you’re afraid.
Pop culture has trained us to believe that the ideal date is grabbing dinner and then hitting up a cool bar for drinks.
But once you have been dating for a while, that combo gets a little stale.
If you have a quirky first date idea, you should go for it!
The worst that could happen is that things don’t work out.
The best thing to happen?
Your date admires you for being bold and unafraid to take risks.
So, go ahead and take them to the circus or the mall to check out your friend’s flash mob.
Even if things eventually fizzle out, your first date will always be memorable.
Dating ideas for Cuffing Season
At this point, going to see a movie as your first date is a cliche. Across the United States, movie theaters have become luxury experiences.
While you watch the latest superhero flick, you can enjoy a glass of wine and a fancy cheeseburger.
Yes, this combo sounds pretty tempting...
However, sitting in a dark room in complete silence isn’t the best way to get to know someone.
It’s time we get rid of going to the movies as a first date once and for all!
There are better, more intimate options than Star Wars.
Feel like you have run out of date ideas but want to do something on the “normal” side?
Check out these tried-and-tested options:
- Farmer’s Markets
- Beach day
- Walks in the park
- Grabbing coffee
Be flexible with your Cuffing Season Date
Especially with dating, you should be accommodating and flexible from the get-go.
You need to be mature and respect your date’s dietary restrictions and lifestyle choices.
For example, when planning a date with someone who is a vegan, you should choose a restaurant that doesn’t exclusively serve meat options.
On the other hand, if your date is sober, planning a pub crawl is probably not a great idea.
For some people, it can be tough to choose a place that doesn’t abide by their lifestyle.
Though you should take the time to research and plan the evening, you should always run it by the other person to check if they are comfortable with the options.
Your thoughtfulness will certainly be appreciated.
Sex might happen — or it won’t — don’t sweat it
Should you have sex on the first date? That question has probably led to countless discussions and articles.
While some people say it’s a big no-no to sleep with someone right off the bat, others don’t think it’s such a big deal.
Ultimately, the only right answer is what you personally feel comfortable with.
This also applies to even something casual like a goodnight kiss.
Though we all have seen the movies where the night ends with a romantic kiss that’s followed by fireworks and shooting stars, in reality, a goodnight kiss isn’t some concrete stamp of approval determining whether you had a good or bad date.
Things can get a little messy — and awkward — but that’s okay!
And if you end up having sex or kissing and it’s initially underwhelming, you shouldn’t write off the date completely.
Sometimes, it can take a while for two people to have sexual chemistry.
First dates aren’t just about hooking up; they are also about measuring other ways your compatible.
Don’t freak out about texting them
After you have had a good first date, determining when exactly you should reach out and text them can cause an entirely new wave of anxiety.
In an ideal scenario, at the end of your first date, you would have made concrete plans with the other person to see them again.
However, that doesn’t always happen.
Even though everyone knows someone who will probably suggest playing hard to get, this is cuffing season after all so people aren’t here just to play games.
You shouldn’t be afraid to be direct.
If you had a great time on the date, there’s nothing wrong with sending a short but sweet text-message wishing them goodnight and thanking them for their time.
And if you’re in the mood to have a little bit of mystique, you can wait for the next morning to follow up.
You should try your best to bring up any inside jokes from the date and subtly lead the conversation to planning a time to see them again.
Don’t worry, they are probably nervous too!
FAQ About Cuffing Season
What is the Cuffing Season?
Cuffing Season is the time of the year when people who normally rather be single "couple up" to fight cold and loneliness.
Basically they want to be "cuffed up".
It pushes people into the "heat" of relationships for the cold months.
When is the Cuffing Season?
Cuffing Season usually occurs around late fall and through the winter, when the days start to get shorter and the temperatures are rapidly dropping.
This motivates people to get "coupled up".
"When it’s cold outside, you should be spending all your time at home watching-series-and-chilling with bae."
Why "Cuffing Season"?
Reasons for the Cuffing Season vary from the crave of people to be "warmth" by the heat of a relationship during the cold months, to the pressure we feel from questions like those we get from aunt Judy during holidays family gatherings like "You dating someone yet?".
Cuffing season shouldn’t be stressful!
With these tips, you can relax, go on dates, and hopefully, find someone to keep you warm during the icy months.
Good luck out there!