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Today you will learn how to stimulate her clitoris to give her hip shaking orgasms.
This is the most comprehensive guide about clitoral stimulation you can find on the web with more than 20 thousand shares (and counting).
I urge you to read it until the end if you really desire to become the sexual superhero your woman always wanted in bed.
A lot of sex tips on the web point to the female clitoris as a “nub,” or a “exterior button.” But 90 percent of men do not know the exact truth.
That little button above woman's vagina is just the tip of the sexual heaven.
A lot of guys have no idea where her clitoris is and how to stimulate the clitoris and you've got to change that.
Literally you grab your lover and you say, "We're going to grab a mirror and a flashlight," and I don't care if you need goggles or a magnifying glass, whatever you need, you get to know where her clitoris is, what it feels like before you learn how to stimulate her clitoris.
I want you to know what it feels like with your finger because its tissue is very, very distinct. It's extremely different from the labia and her lips.
It's got a quality of tissue that is difficult for me to describe, it has a quality of erectile tissue that is unlike any other part.
So when you find the clitoris, that's why it can be so sensitive because you have all these nerve endings right there and a lot of guys are like, "Oh, I found it and now I'm going to rub it really hard".
No, no, no.
That thing is hidden by a hood generally, so it's extremely sensitive. So it may be that clitoral stimulation is done on the skin on top of the clitoris, but just know where it is.
And for that to happen you should be able to feel before you even touch her sexually, even if you're touching on top of the hood of the clitoris, you should be able to know that you're on it because you'll feel that little band, that little beautiful tube of erectile tissue.
It's like a little penis, it fills with blood, it gets engorged and it feels awesome to her as your cock feels to you when you have a hard-on.
So this is an interesting factoid of the clit – women are the only mammals that have this organ that is devoted solely to their pleasure.
The clitoris has no other function than sexual pleasure. That's it.
So now you understand WHY it is key to understand and master how to stimulate it properly.
Get familiar with it. It's beautiful. It feels awesome. It's great.
Know what it feels like with your tongue. Know what it feels like with your fingertips.
Notice what it feels like inside, outside, when it's filled with blood, when she's turned on, when she's not so turned on.
Understand and realize that there is a band of nerves that run all the way up from her clitoris to her brain.
These beautiful long dendrites that communicate pleasure, you want to know these things. You want to stimulate them.
You want to awaken them and open them. This is such a key to having an exceptional sexual experience for both of you.
Nobody is exactly the same. There is no perfect pussy. There is no perfect way to rub this thing.
Everything is different and unique. There are generalities, but there is no one right touch.
Each woman will have her general patterns that she'll like to experience with her body.
Now feel free to ask her sexual questions about self-pleasure in front of you.
Have her show you how she rubs her clit if she's going for a clitoral orgasm.
A woman will have a way that she does things... just ask her to show you. That gets really cool. It's beautiful to watch and then you can try.
See if you can emulate that same kind of touch and let her teach you.
It may take some time to learn how to stimulate her clitoris in a way she actually enjoys, but it's totally worth it.
It's like riding a bike. Once you learn, you will not forget how to do it right. It's so cool to suddenly be able to give her a clitoral orgasm whenever you want.
It would be the same thing like if you were trying to teach her how you like to self-pleasure. There is a certain way you like things done.
Your hand gets into a certain position or there's a certain pressure or a speed and when that thing hits, it's perfect.
It is like, "Whoa" and then you're there. Well the same thing is true for her.
Then you have the labia. The labia are wonderful.
There's the opening to the vagina where there are lots and lots of nerve endings, and that the legs of the clitoris actually run through there.
So you can actually stimulate the clitoris from the inside of her vagina and as you move down, you have the inner lips and the outer lips and those can be licked, massaged, played with, touched, energy touched, flow touched.
You can use all of that and then, of course, there's her ass and the space in between the bottom of her pussy and the beginning of her ass (the Perineum).
It is also filled with nerve bundles, and the ass itself has tremendous nerve bundles that can be extremely powerful and stimulating.
That's why you've probably heard of these techniques.
If you have a finger in her ass and your mouth is on her clit and you're using that up and down technique sort of from the opening across the urethra up to her clit and you're sending energy through her ass and you're getting everything stimulated.
There are so many things that will generate an enormous amount of pleasure for her which will make her crave and want you desperately.
It feels really good, but she needs to know that you're not judgmental and she also needs to feel really relaxed if you're going to do any kind of ass play at all.
Those are things to communicate about. If she doesn't want to be worrying about "Oh, is there any toilet paper…" just small things like that, you want to get that stuff out of the way because any kind of mental stress will cause her discomfort and potentially you discomfort, which is the wrong direction.
The G-spot is the pleasure center.
So many women have not really been awakened to the G-spot because most guys, if they hear about it, they're just poking or rubbing.
The G-spot is something that you want to be aware of. Your cock is actually sort of shaped in a way to stimulate the G-spot.
Pro Tip: Learn how to find the G-Spot here.
So depending on how you position her, but especially if she's on her tummy and you're behind her, you can actually get the bottom of your cock rubbing up and down slowly.
By the way, this is not a pounding thing. This is just a nice back and forth rocking motion right across that two inches of her G-spot.
So you're not going all the way inside. You're just focusing on the G-spot where you go sort of from the opening of her vagina and in about two inches, and in and out.
So she's on her tummy and you're penetrating in and out about two inches deep, just stimulating both the clitoris (and the legs of the clitoris) as well as the G-spot.
The G-spot is also the equivalent of the male prostate. So as you get closer to orgasm and actually just before ejaculation, the prostate swells hard.
It gets like a walnut kind of hard and then you ejaculate and it releases, but that swelling is part of what is involved in your orgasmic response, and she has the same thing.
It is a very powerful, powerful orgasm for her.
You could have her rubbing her clit while you, with two fingers (I like to use my middle finger and my ring finger and keep my other two fingers, my pinky and my pointer finger open, because I can get deepest with my middle finger), and I'll rub her G-spot or circle around it.
Circles are beautiful shapes. Remember circles. You can move in circles with your cock.
You can move in circles with your fingers, because circles are a different shape other than the typical piston in and out, in and out, in and out.
Circles can stimulate the clitoris and all kinds of nerves inside the vagina, inside the ass, inside the mouth.
So using your two fingers, you could have her rub her clitoris in her self-pleasure style while you are circling around the G-spot, and eventually, as she becomes more in her pleasure and more sensitized.
You can actually apply more and more pressure to the G-Spot to the point where sometimes you can be pressing as hard as you possibly can and she's just loving every second of it the closer she gets to ejaculation.
Pro Tip: When she is highly aroused sexually, and her body is going through the shakes and she's quivering and doing all those beautiful things, slow down your movements.
The G-spot may excrete liquid as she ejaculates. I've had that happen probably, I'm going to say, 40 to 50 percent of the time.
There will be some sort of liquid that comes out when I do extensive G-spot play.
It's usually called "squirting" and you can learn more here.
What I like to do is put a towel down, a couple towels, or a bunch of towels down and say, "Hey, you know, if you do feel like you're going to pee, that's fine. Let it flow. That's totally fine."
Of course, you need a good comfort level.
She needs to be relaxed, trust needs to be high, but the reality is that it's a great thing and things can get exceedingly wet.
I don't know if you've ever looked at female ejaculation (squirting) on any one of the porn channels. You can see these huge sprays sometimes.
Now, a lot of times they're just putting water in their vaginas and squirting that out, but sometimes it's really. . . you know, you can get a lot of liquid flowing.
So I put down some towels, and I just say, "Hey look, if you feel like you're going to pee, just pee."
Because if she can release that level, you'll understand how the clitoris is being stimulated, the bladder is being stimulated, the urethra is being stimulated, and the G-spot prostate is being stimulated – that's a lot of pleasure stimulation.
Add the clitoris onto that, you've got like five things going at the same time, and when orgasm comes, the ass is involved.
Everything starts going and contracting, the whole pelvic floor, and that's what makes these very complex delicious orgasms, and they're wonderful.
The woman that you're with, your lover, should be able to have a whole range of orgasms in her experience.
It shouldn’t be just one.
Really help her to expand her sense of pleasure and orgasms, and this is what makes this so frickin' beautiful and what makes communication so beautiful here.
Most people feel ashamed about asking for what they want sexually. Most women you encounter are going to feel shame.
They're going to be ashamed that you're going to think they're a whore or they're a slut or some other ridiculous story.
So you really need to let her know, you don't judge. You want to experience pleasure.
Look, you don't want her to judge you, so why do you want to judge her?
By the way, if you're the kind of person who's like, "Oh, this is a lot of bullshit. Whatever. Judgment, judgment," this article isn't for you.
This is for people who are ready to be adult in their sexuality. That's really the truth.
So if you're going to judge a woman for opening up to you, seriously, stop reading this article right now.
This is for people who are ready to take their sexuality into their own hands and step up into adult sexuality.
So if you can do these techniques and a woman opens up, you want to encourage her to open up.
It's like you're tending a garden and using the metaphor of a flower in a garden with her pussy being that flower.
I want that flower to open and swell and give me all of her gifts, and I want to celebrate that opening of her gifts. I want tears to come.
I want to eat her beautiful pussy, I want her to be in her bliss and her happiness.
So you want to get comfortable with having your partner ask for what she needs tonight, what would make her feel good, seduce her mentally, what does she think she needs.
You're going to have to adjust that as it goes, but keep the questions simple.
These are fun. It's playful.
You can sometimes ask questions, "What fantasy do you have in your head tonight?"
Or "What kinds of things have you been fantasizing about at work?"
Again, if you're asking her to share her fantasies, suppose she says, "I had this dream that my boss bent me over the table and just fucked me on his lunch break and just threw me down."
And if you go to her, "Oh, you slut" you just shut her down and she will never open up to you again.
The thing is, if you're going to ask her to communicate both fantasies, dreams, whatever she wants to do, you need to be like "Yes, fabulous. I'm excited."
Share yours, too.
Let's say you shared yours, "Oh, I had this fantasy that I had three girls on me."
You wouldn't like her saying... "Ew, that's so disgusting. You're such a man whore."
That's not fun for anybody. That's why we want to shift out of this judgmental nonsense and move more into adulthood.
Ask simple questions. "Faster, slower, perfect?"
Simple, "How's the speed on that? You want it faster? You want it slower?"
Let's say you're rubbing her clit or licking her clit, "Do you want it faster, slower, or is it perfect? Do you want it harder?"
If I'm using my fingers on her G-spot, I will always ask, "Do you want it harder? Do you want it softer? Is it perfect?"
She will clearly communicate, "Go a little bit softer. No, no, actually right now, a little bit harder."
If you can just have her say those words, harder, faster, slower, softer, she doesn’t have to think.
She can just be like, "Oh, oh, oh, harder, okay, good, good, yes, yes, good, faster, slower."
She can be in her flow without disturbing anything, and then you can talk about more pressure, less pressure, is that perfect?
So communication in the moment is wonderful and you will give her the most intense orgasm in her life.
Because it will be EXACTLY the way she wants it.
This is the key here, slow things down.
Right now I want you to check this out:
Take your arm. Right now, do this. Rub your arm and rub it fast.
Just rub your arm quickly.
That's how most people are having sex.
It's all about speed and friction.
There's a reason we do that. It's because most of us are ashamed of sex.
We're all trying to have our pleasure quickly. We don't want anybody to catch us.
If we have pleasure, then we're being selfish and dirty and perverted.
So there's a lot of nonsense that comes with this.
There's a lot of really bad training.
If you're a typical male, you've learned how to masturbate in like two minutes quietly.
So you don't ever express your pleasure loudly.
We're always having to hide our pleasure. It is bizarre. People can be openly violent.
They can be openly screaming.
Couples can fight and scream and everybody's cool with that, but if you openly show your pleasure and you were to really deeply kiss your woman out in public or fuck her in public, out in the middle where everybody can see you, you'd be arrested in like two seconds.
But can you scream at her?
We really have it ass backwards. We have to re-train ourselves about our pleasure and we have to re-train our central nervous system for pleasure, the way we think about it, the way our brains experience pleasure.
So now I want you to do the same touch:
But this time, I want you to touch your arm slowly, slowly enough to feel everything, the texture, the hair.
Going slower allows you to pick up more information. You're barely touching with the lightest of touch. You're barely caressing over your hair.
You're barely touching your skin and you're moving slowly, and notice how much more detail you can receive and feel.
Slow down. Slow down. Slow down everything. Slow down.
It allows you to take in details.
You want to start to learn to touch in a way where you can feel everything, the texture, those little fine beautiful hairs.
If you can start to train yourself to feel those, as she comes closer to orgasm, often times she'll get goose bumps, goose flesh, on her ass and her spine.
If you're not tuned into it, you'll never feel it, you'll never see it, but her hair stands up and goose bumps go and boom, there she comes and of course just the moisture and texture on her skin, all of this stuff is so great.
So driving slowly down a country road is a completely different experience than trying to go as fast as you can.
We want to learn to drive slowly.
If you go to see a movie... you want to be teased a little bit.
You want some adventure, but you want to know that an hour and a half from now, you're going to have the climax and it's going to be amazing.
Sex is the same thing.
You don't want to go to a movie and have the climax of the movie happen in the first two minutes, which is how most guys are having sex.
Imagine sitting down and the whole climax of the movie happens in the first three minutes and then you had to watch all the boring crap after that, you'd be like, "What did I just do? I want my money back."
So you want to start slowly. You want to work your way up.
You want to have those touches, those tender pieces.
Now, not always, obviously; sometimes it's good to just throw down and fuck and get it on.
That's awesome, too – and maybe you do cum really fast, and even if you do cum fast, then you can go down on her and you can rub her G-spot and give her a G-spot orgasm, or play with some vibrators or her favorite toys.
Be creative. This is fun. We're talking about sex.
You spent all your life trying to get laid and here you are, and then you just rush through it. What is the point of that?
No, you want to build. You want to get involved. What people call foreplay is really just really good storytelling.
Foreplay is a bullshit term that is confusing because it makes it sound like it's work. It's not work.
Foreplay is the tease of what will come after.
Lube is an awesome thing. I literally have . . . it's kind of funny, but on my desk here and everywhere in the house, I've got these 54 ounce jars of coconut oil because they are amazing.
Coconut oil is awesome. It's natural.
You can eat it. It's good for your body. It's good for her. It's good for her skin, good for your skin. There's everything good about coconut oil.
It is really almost the perfect lube. It is not so good when it comes to the ass and ass play. It's not viscous enough.
If you're going to do anything with anal sex or anal fingers, anything like that, you want to use as thick a lube as possible.
And there are lubes that are specifically made for that.
I'm not going to mention them, but you can go to any store and just do a little research and find out what the best anal lubes are at any given moment.
Of course, because there's so much blood tissue, real sensitive absorbing tissue around the ass, if you can find a more natural lube, that'd be better.
Coconut oil is perfect because it is natural. It's all natural. I use extra virgin, but you can use whatever – just a nice brand of coconut oil and it works perfectly.
You can use it as a moisturizer. It's really kind of an amazing thing.
So use and apply lube. This has nothing to do with how turned on she is.
Condoms will dry out lube, so they'll dry out her natural juices. So understand that lube is a great thing to have and carry with you and use and it means nothing.
A woman's wetness, she could be more or less wet depending on the circumstances, the time of the month.
There are all kinds of factors, so just carry lube with you and have it available.
I will stop here. If you enjoyed reading this article on how to stimulate her clitoris as I did writing it, please leave your comment below!
My name is Manish Yadav and I’m the owner of the blog "Love Finds its Way". My advice does away with the manipulations and mind games recommended by magazines and the surface level advice of TV gurus… We’ll dive DEEP into the psychology and biology of desire and give you actionable steps you can use today. Over 900,000 men & women have transformed their relationships as a result, and I've been featured in Lifehack, Return of Kings, Menimprovement, Urban Dater, and so on... ...and no... We're not here to play games so you can manipulate your significant other... ...My only intention is to help you and your partner have a healthy and loving relationship by working on your intimacy with each other. And we’re just getting started!
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