What do you say? Are you up for a mind-reading? I mean would you like to learn about the things men want women to know more than anything in the world?
I thought you would!
So if you’re ready to find out the BIG SECRET what men want women to know, read this article till the end.
Thing #1: He desperately wants you to know ... that your not ‘getting’ him is crushing his fragile little soul.
So what is it, exactly, a man want you to understand about them?
The truth is, there is no easy answer to that question. Or, rather, there is no one single answer. How could there be?
I mean, think about your secret desire to have a man who knows how to care for you. That same feeling he should feel when he looks at you.
One man might want a woman to understand why music is such an important part of his life; another man may not be that into music, but has never found a woman who doesn’t roll her eyes at his action figure collection.
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But it is not just about the seemingly superficial things in his life that he needs you to understand – even though, honestly, taking the time to learn about these things can give you astonishing insight into other aspects of his personality.
Or it could reveal an interesting part of his past. Or who knows – you might discover that you share his passion!
The thing is he also wants you to understand what he needs from you, too. But note that this does NOT mean that he wants you to be a mind reader.
Instead, he wants you to know how to “read” him in other ways – his actions, and what he is trying to say when he tries to communicate with you.
Thing #2: He desperately wants you to know ... that he needs you to be on his side.
This particular desire of his is one that would naturally follow that of understanding him.
However, before we get into how you can show him that you are on his side, first I want to make it perfectly clear what it actually means to be “on a man’s side.”
This does not mean you have to take his side in an argument he may have with another person, if you don’t agree.
Nor does it mean you should say yes to every idea he has. Remember, what man want is a woman who is independent, confident, who can stand on her own two feet.
Instead, needing you to be on his side means that he needs to see you as an equal partner – because a relationship should be comprised of different contributions by each partner.
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So, what do you have to do? You need to listen to him, and try your best to understand his motivations and his decisions.
And you also need to know when he needs you to jump in and lend a hand, and when to leave him alone to figure it out himself.
Another part of being on his side is being his cheerleader, staying positive, and not putting him down, either in private and in public.
He doesn’t want to fight you for everything he wants, and he doesn’t need your permission.
In effect, you should work with him, not against him.
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Thing #3: He desperately wants you to know ... that he needs adventure.
That being said, part of the deal is that the woman in his life understands his need for adventure, and makes an effort to incorporate those adventures into their life together.
To illustrate what I mean, I’m going to tell you about Suzanne and Henry
Suzanne and Henry have been married for ten years, and they have three kids.
Henry has a great job, even if it works him to the bone; Suzanne raises the kids, does all the planning for the family, and takes care of the house and bills.
And as part of her planning, Suzanne makes a conscious effort to budget the time and money for Henry to have his adventures.
For example, he had been saying how cool it would be to be able to play the guitar, so for his birthday she gave him weekly lessons with a local teacher.
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He also missed surfing from when he was a kid, so during their summer vacation they went to a place where he could rent a surfboard and hit the waves.
And for another birthday, she made a lifelong dream of his come true – he went heli-skiing!
Now, of course, it’s not like she is suffering at home alone with kids hanging off of her all day while he roams around doing fun things. This is part of their partnership.
For Henry’s part, he arranges to work from home at least one day a week, and watches the kids so she can have the day free.
And for their yearly family vacation, they go wherever she chooses. They also both have girls’ and guys’ weekends, separately, with their friends.
Now, obviously, they are in a position to afford these things. Not all of us are! But, that doesn’t mean that the effort can’t be made.
Like, let’s say that your guy wants to take guitar lessons. Maybe you can’t afford to have someone come to the house – but you could probably find videos on YouTube and burn them onto a DVD for him to watch while he learns.
Or maybe at a yard sale you pick up a great used guitar because he doesn’t even have one yet.
The very fact that you heard him when he said he wanted to learn, understood he was serious, and are now working with him to help him reach that goal, means everything to him.
And the fact that you’re giving him the freedom to dream, even for a moment, of being a rock star when he practices the guitar will send him to the moon and back.
The point is as a women you need to understand the things that men want from you to keep the spice alive in your relationship.
Thing #4: He desperately wants you to know ... that he’s more insecure than he seems.
There are times when guys are insecure and confused about their feelings and that is WHY he needs you to know about them.
Basically, you can consider this a direct message from him. That is because he desperately wants you to know, but he would rather be eaten by a bear than admit it to HIMSELF,
let alone to someone whose love and respect he wants just as desperately.
But he needs you to know it – to understand it – because an important part of feeling close to you is being able to feel respected and relaxed around you.
If instead you are constantly needing him to be strong, and figure everything out, and make all the decisions, he’s going to have a full-on meltdown. And then he’s going to leave.
So, from him to me to you, please, he is begging you to understand that he has no idea what he’s doing either.
He’s trying as best he can, and if you could just stay positive and keep cheering him on and not be mean when he fails, he will follow you to the ends of the earth!
Thing #5: He desperately wants you to know ... that he is ALWAYS going to check out other women.
Men are visual creatures. So – and I realize this is blunt – don’t freak out when you see his gaze land on another woman.
I mean, seriously. Play out that scenario in your head. What do you think he is going to do about it? Is he going to leave you sitting at the table and go and hit on her?
Is he going to forget you exist? Is he really, actually in deep love with a woman who’s standing 40 feet away talking on her cell phone, probably to her own husband?
Nope. No he is not. He just wanted to catch a glimpse of a beautiful woman.
He did it when he was 14, and he will do it when he is 90. Get over it. Because he might think she is pretty - but he wants to be with YOU!
Simply put, when he wants you to know that he is going to look at other women, It has nothing to do with his level of attraction to you.
This are little things men want women to know and if you can understand this little things you will have the BEST relationship and love life ever.
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Thing #6: He desperately wants you to know ... that sometimes, he just needs time to recharge. Alone.
This one is such a hard one for him to communicate with you. That is because, basically, there is no nice way for him to tell you to leave him alone.
Let me explain you a BIT about The Man Cave to illustrate my point in a better way.
The Man Cave is that space in a couple’s shared home – it could be a garage, or a basement, or a spare room, or even a carved out niche in the den – that a man retreats to when he wants time to himself.
Some men keep their collections, or things from their adolescence, here; some have tools or games; others have an entertainment center and a comfy chair.
To us, it looks like anything except a place where we’d want to spend time. (It’s designed that way, of course.)
So many women are bitter about the Man Cave that is in their home. They think it’s dirty, or that it smells.
They are worried their men are going in there to look at porn. When he brings a buddy over, she is sure he is in there bitching about her.
Why can’t she have some space all to herself? Why can’t she take four hours out of her day to watch TV and let someone else take care of the house or the kids?
The point that I want to convey is - even if you are the world’s coolest girlfriend, and he is super-addicted to you – he still is going to want to be alone sometimes.
This can be extremely difficult to understand, particularly in the beginning stages of a relationship.
There is always that moment, usually after you have been spending a bunch of time together and everything is bathed in a love glow and it seems like you have finally found your soul mate, when the bubble bursts:
He doesn’t have plans, there is nothing else he needs to do, but he is going to spend the evening alone at home.
It can be a crushing blow if you don’t see it coming. And more often than not, it is this very moment in which a previously amazing, cool girl becomes an obsessive, over-analytical crazy person.
Which is why he is desperate for you to know that spending time by himself is just something that he needs in his life. He doesn’t want to lose you over this.
He doesn’t want to make you angry or nervous or jealous. He is no less into you than before. It’s not some secret coded message. He’s not cheating on you.
This also goes for needing time not BY himself, but FOR himself. Maybe he wants to play Mario Kart with his best friend for 10 hours. Maybe he has a regular Saturday morning basketball game.
Maybe he is having a buddy help him restore an old computer or car, or he’s helping someone install a back deck.
Whatever it is, it’s HIS time. Don’t offer to come along. Don’t sit there and watch like a creepy stalker.
Don’t say you’ll swing by and bring them a snack. Just let him have his time, without you. Trust me; or more importantly, trust HIM – he is not going to forget about you!
I will stop here. i hope you enjoyed this article on things men want women to know and I believe this 6 points will make a difference in your relationship with your man.
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